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Wednesday, July 02, 2008
deprived of sleep :/
hello there, the angel from my nightmare. shadows in the background of the wall...
heh heh ok. went Ps with Xiang&Lili today!! :D:D in search of ah heng's present(i wont tell you what we each got for him bcuz he reads my blog!! hehehe). Pohee came to find us at about 6plus i think. yepppp eh ah heng, i played a part in choosing your gift(s) from xiang ok!! its niceeeeeeee, really :D:D:D pauline was supposed to come too, but she claims shes tired.
ok, im officially broke now. im left with only 5bucks in my wallet for the rest of the week :/ how does that sounds? maybe when pauline returns me the 12bucks for the present she shared with pohee&lili, i might be abit richer after that(i hope?).
im starting to feel the excitement of birthdays(alot of july babies i know). no, i actually kinda anticipate it heh heh heh! and even if Pauline really doesnt turns up, i guess i cant do much? afterall, i should trust that we're all sensible enough to prioritise our stuff, no? no la, im not mad, maybe just a teenyweenybit upset/disappointed. but its ok, i guess we all have to learn to stand on our own feets and stop relying on the people around us. but on another hand, i quite like it that i have people there for me when i need reliance. so should i blame people for throwing me aside to feed myself or should i thank them bcuz they made me more independent?
on a lighter note, i think im ready to be friends with sook again. since she said we can try to be friends on the surface first, so why not?
oh, another thing. i really need to stop feeling like how i felt today. i need to stop indulging in self-pity. i need to stop feeling so insecure of myself. fat people can be pretty too, i guess? i need to start believing that if i believe, it will come true. i need to keep up with the momentum to study, or rather, dont lose it. i need to believe that i will do well so that it will really happen. i just wanto do well enough to get into a course in poly(haha). ok im gonna stop, my contacts are superrrr dry!
waitwait. this is so irritating, i swear!
me: eh what is the only thing that doesnt change in life?
the rest: all gave up cuz no one got the right answer.
me: change; the only thing that doesnt change in life, is change.
all/anyone who hears it from me: BURSTS INTO LAUGHTER.
walaoeh, funny meh? its super true ok! they treat it like a joke, stupid jonathanangthegreatsotong. everyday he sees me in school, he'll go: " bian! bian! bian!" bian=change. waloooooo! and pauline oh says whatev that comes out from my mouth sounds like a joke even if im super serious, OUCH.
lastly, i swear im very deprived of sleep. bcuz i drag myself outta bed every morning 15mins after my "supposed-to-wake-up time". and i sleep like a log in 851 every morning. stupid chinapumpkins always lean on me with their bags/bump into me when the bus halts all offa sudden/scald me with their packed food. WALAO, SO IRRITATING CAN ANOT. stupidcheenapiangs. i so wanto glare at them you know, but i try not to bcuz even 5mins of sleep on the bus is essential to me. hahahahaha
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11:11 PM
Yours truly.
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